You may have read a recent report about three adults and seven children holding a BBQ in a West Yorkshire graveyard. Nothing wrong with that, you may think. After all, the early Christians regularly held feasts at the tombs of their dead and, even today, in southern Europe and Latin America it is not uncommon to find people eating and drinking and making merry in cemeteries to mark All Saints/All Souls. However, the couple who spotted the BBQ-ing group were shocked to see that they were using a tombstone for their BBQ. When remonstrated with, one of the men replied in a less than gracious manner. The rest is Social Media history.
Presumably, it was not principally the fact that the BBQ was being held in consecrated ground that gave offence but the use of a particular memorial and the churlish response to the suggestion that doing so was ‘disrespectful’. (There is no hint that the tombstone belonged to a family member of either the BBQ-ers or the complainers.) It is a clear case of two different standards of behaviour clashing. On the one side, there is the ‘I can do what I like’ approach; on the other, the ‘there are limits to what is acceptable’ point of view.
I daresay there are laws that cover what may or may not be done in Anglican churchyards but I doubt whether they explicitly mention BBQs. Part of me has no problem with partying in a graveyard, provided no damage is done and all waste is cleared away; part of me finds the use of a memorial to the dead as nothing more than a convenient table-top for cooking rather repugnant. I wonder what your response would have been, and how you would have dealt with the situation? Me, I suspect I would have taken the coward’s way out, and passed by on the other side, saying nothing but praying for the group and for the deceased.